Don’t get me wrong, I love Valentine’s Day. I love making silly cards for my husband and kids. I love all the cute decorations. I love love love that it involves chocolate. Valentine’s Day is a great day to do something fun for the people you love. I was going to share a cute last minute Valentine’s Day craft but I am pretty sure there are a billion and a half of those already on Pinterest. I decided to be a little more honest instead.
For those of you who are single please see your current state as a great opportunity. I know it is hard to hear that from a married woman with kids but it’s true. My husband and children require my time and energy. There is nothing wrong with that. It is just where I am. When someone is single there are different opportunities available.
You have opportunities to love. There are a lot of people who need love out there and I am not talking about dating sites full of people wanting romantic love. I mean a kid who needs a mentor, a coworker who needs a kind word, the homeless man who needs a new pair of socks.
You have opportunities to be loved. One of the most meaningful gifts I ever received on February 14th was one flower from a friend when I was single. Love from family and friends is much undervalued in our overly sexual culture. We, both single and taken, need to remember to think outside the romantic heart-shaped box when it comes to love. Love is bigger.
Loneliness is real and it hurts. I am sorry. When I am lonely, and yes married people even happily married people feel lonely from time to time, I talk to the one I know always loves me or I read his love letters. Maybe Valentine’s Day could be an opportunity for you to know God's love. His love is more than enough.
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Alright if any of you not single types are still reading, you’re up. Valentine’s Day is many great things but Valentine’s Day is not the day to rush a relationship or pretend feelings that are not really there. It is not a day to judge where your whole relationship stands and it is not a day to decide what your commitment means. There are more divorces filed the week after Valentine’s Day than any other time of the year. This is a huge problem. There is obviously a great deal involved with this, more than just Valentine’s Day but there is a stupid amount of expectation tied into the day. I am pretty sure the pressure to be perfect at romance is most heavily felt by men but it is on both sides. More importantly when expectations are too high a couple as a whole can feel strain. I realize I am not in any sort of a position to give advice but I am going to anyway. Keep it fun and simple. Communicate what you actually want and expect from one another.
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I write all of this because although I obviously like a cute craft with a heart involved, I like thriving marriages more. Here are two marriage helpers.
One Extraordinary Marriage Podcast
Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
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Detail from my latest almost finished project. I cannot wait to share it. |
I did not realize I have made so many
hearts.
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